YOUR PASS IS WHAT MAKES YOU!!
Mar 29, 2019
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lk-zPFYOyxY

oh my gosh you guys I am so so so so
happy to finally be reached to the end
of the week it has been a long week for
me a long week for me you guys like long
week when I say long week we're talking
a long week for me because I've just
been sick so I am so happy to finally
have reached my weekend and I mean it's
nice in my household because really my
weekends are always everyday because I
would say I have a mom and I work from
home so you know but so it's just
something about saying it's Friday I
don't know why but just the words it's
Friday tomorrow is Saturday
what makes a difference I don't know but
it's Friday and that's all that matters
and I woke up today feeling so much
better I'm still pretty stuffy but it's
ok you know it's it's all right I woke
up this morning I had a really nice
combo with my mom that was nice we
haven't talked for a long time so um
like really like be able to talk talk so
it was nice to finally be able to
chitchat for a little bit do some
catching up that was nice and I did some
catching up on my snapchats oh my gosh I
was so far behind but it's because I've
been sick that I haven't really been
paying much attention to my phone but
yeah it's just crazy um but I'm starting
to feel like I'm reaching the
corner of and that's what matters the
most um I do feel really swollen today
like in my face so I don't know what's
going on there know if it's from the
sinus infection not really sure where
that's going with but yeah I'm feeling a
little bit like if I push like up in
here I can feel it like the pressure um
I can't tell you the last time I had a
sinus infection if I've really ever had
a sinus infection I don't know but this
really sucks and it's not fun especially
in that pressure within your eyes like
my eyes if I pulled this thing close
enough to my eyeball you would see that
the below my eyes down here are all
bloodshot I don't know if that's just
from the pressure but even pushing right
in here it feels like someone punched
the crap out of my eye and in reality
nobody touched me but my sinuses did
anyways let's do our reading early quick
I'm excited to get into our book today I
don't know why but I feel like today's
gonna be a good reading as every day
okay we are on February 25th and before
I forget I just want to mention because
a couple people are like hey I've
commented and you're not seeing my
comments or my comments have disappeared
you guys I don't know what is going on
but for some reason must my messages are
going into my spam spam likely folder
and I forgot to go and pull those out
and um approve them so they'll show up
on the the dialog or whatever so please
don't feel like I'm ignoring the
comments or anything in that manner I
really am NOT I promise I'm not I just
don't know why it's doing that so please
know that I am definitely making sure to
check my messages and all of that stuff
it's just I don't know why they keep
being sent into the messaging the way
that their messaging I'm not sure why
it's doing that
my picture is crooked Jer can you open
the door for her please
okay so February 25th you didn't survive
everything you've been through just to
stay where you are trans trials inspire
growth but growth
movement Wow let's read that one again
you didn't survive everything you've
been through just to stay where you are
trials inspire growth but growth
requires movement um it kind of goes
along with what we were talking about
almost yesterday talking about how like
you know sometimes people say oh my god
I had the worst childhood and I've you
know I just I hate that I had the
childhood I had or I I'm I so I I'm sick
and tired of the past that I had or I
feel bad that I had the past I had in
for me as much as I went through why is
it what well if you washed her then
she's gonna be wet we'll go put her put
her in the dirty laundry in a washer um
anyways so no no no put it by the towels
by the telephony over there behind the
door honey yes no but yes no yes thank
you no go find another house and I'll
wash that one
so anyways for me it's like I don't I am
NOT sorry for the past that I had it has
made me who I am today because I've
chosen to take the trials that I've gone
through and be the better person that I
can be off of what I have learned from
the things that I've gone through and
you know there's two different types of
people that can handle life situations
you've got one person that can be stuck
in the past blame everybody for their
past hold everybody accountable for
their past and that type of a person
will never be one that can move on and
become uh no why are we in the bathroom
um hurry up
anyways you get stuck in the past and
then you just stay in the past and it's
almost like you mold yourself into the
past and that's what's so hard and so
sad because you don't want to see
somebody like that you don't want to see
somebody stuck so far into the past that
they can't get themselves out and those
are the people that never grow they
never become who they truly could be
because they constantly are replaying
the past in their brain and so they can
never grow the strength to move on then
you've got another type of person that
can take what has happened to them in
the past and the scenarios and the
situations and put that into what
they're living their future and their
present and make the person that they
are today because of those things and
kind of be thankful for what has
happened to them instead of being the
victim but use what has happened to them
to build themselves stronger and that's
what I've chosen to do I've chosen to
not live a victim life like I am NOT a
victim of my past I hold very cautiously
what has happened in my past I use
what's happened in my past with my daily
living today I'm very protective of my
children because of my childhood
molestations and rapes that happen to me
so there's lots and lots and lots and
lots of things that I take from the past
that I can put into my life to date and
in my future life but because I do that
doesn't mean that I you know can
continue to live into the past because
that's just not gonna be that's not who
I am and I don't want my children to
look at my past and be like oh my god my
mom lived such a horrible life and you
know and let my past play into their
their future lives but rather maybe
hearing the stories of my past them look
at me and say wow my mom is a survivor
and she's gone through so much but look
where she's at today and that's the type
of person that I want to be so there's
two different types of people you can
either
all four or not four at all and when
you're stuck in that situation it's
really really really sad because you
will never ever ever get to where you
need to be in life if you're constantly
living the past and not building from
the trials that you've gone through in
life and use those as a ladder to build
yourself up to the next level because
you never want to be stuck at the bottom
level and at least I don't you know I
want to see what life can give what life
can offer and that's all part of
learning the techniques of not
continuing to be the victim but become
the survivor so that you can follow
through suit with what you live now you
know and your philosophies like for me
my philosophy is you're no longer a
victim you're a survivor because of what
you've gone through you can use as a
ladder and I live that daily Ezra what
are you doing you need to hurry up guys
so it's just it's all in all such a
beautiful thing that you know you can
look at it in two different aspects but
am i a victim sometimes or am i a
failure at some times of becoming a
victim of my past yeah yeah I'm not I'm
not perfect you know I sometimes fall
into that you know god I wish that this
just wouldn't have happened because then
I wouldn't have this issue but at the
end of the day when all is said and done
and I'm laying my head down for bed I
can look through my entire day and say
well I went through this situation today
and this is how I handled it because of
what happened in the past and where I'm
at today so it all comes together at the
end of the day that no matter what I'm
always going to be the survivor I'm not
going to be that victim
so that reading is really good I want to
read it one more time
you didn't survive everything you've
been through just to stay where you are
trials inspire growth but growth
requires movement so just stick that
with you you know on an everyday thing
use your trials
use your use your situations to build a
stronger path for where you want to be
in life because it's just I think all in
all it's it's all about building rather
than crashing so yeah that was a really
good reading I really enjoyed that one
I've enjoyed all of them but yeah um
before I forget so um next Thursday
okay so hold on me rephrase let me let
me back up a little bit
kitto mama I have your shirt ready it's
gonna be packaged up and meld out I am
again so sorry that I have been such a
flake on getting your stuff to you I
apologize I apologize I apologize I
apologize this Thursday is our giveaway
so I am getting names written down so
remember to put your name in for the
giveaway so don't forget about that that
will be this coming Thursday and I think
that is it I don't think there was
really anything else that I that I did
I've just taken a couple days off but
today I think I'm gonna work on a on a
cup so um yeah I am working on my Etsy
shop I am going to be opening up an Etsy
shop I am I am I am I think that's gonna
be my easiest about for getting my
business up and running so I am working
on that I've been watching lots of
tutorials and things on how to run a
successful Etsy shop so I have been
working on that since yesterday took
lots of pictures of different things
that I'll be selling so anyways keep
your eyes peeled for that and yeah I
hope you guys are all having a wonderful
blessed Friday and a great start to your
guys as weakens I hope everybody is
taking care I am sorry today's a short
one but I just you know I want to keep
it short and sweet today I enjoy being
able to do what I do but some days are
shorter than others anyways I will check
in with you guys soon I will be going to
possibly get my nails done tonight and
if I do
take you guys along all right I'll talk
to you later bye-bye
